Living in a Field of Hats

some ramblings and reflections on working with students in Herts and Beds.

I’ve had questions… April 29, 2012

Filed under: Christian Life — Sarah @ 2:16 pm
Tags: , , , ,

Much of my time is spent in my car driving between the Uni’s in Hertfordshire and Bedfordshire during term time, and the novelty of local radio often starts to wane late in the evening. So, I found my old mp3 player this week and let it play as I was driving to Bedford on Friday night. My mind started wander through some of the events of the last few months, and all of a sudden there was clarity in them. The song that had started playing suddenly made sense of what I was trying to process …

I’ve had questions, without answers,
I’ve known sorrow, I have known pain
but there’s one thing, that I’ll cling to
you are faithful, Jesus you’re true

When hope is lost, I’ll call you Saviour
When pain surrounds, I’ll call you healer
When silence falls, you’ll be the song within my heart

In the lone hour, of my sorrow
through the darkest night of my soul
you surround me, and sustain me
my defender, forever more

When hope is lost, I’ll call you saviour
When pain surrounds, I’ll call you healer
When silence falls, you’ll be the song within my heart

I will praise you, I will praise you
when the tears fall, still I will sing to you
I will praise you, Jesus praise you
Through the suffering still I will sing “

Tim Hughes, “I’ve had questions”

This isn’t to say that listening to one song has sorted it all out – far from it. But it did clarify where I’m at – it still feels in so many ways that I’m ‘in the lone hour’, but that’s not a hopeless place to be, not because I’m not truly alone (although that is also true), but because the story doesn’t stop with me. There will be a day when there’s no more tears, pain or suffering because Jesus is faithful. And that is a day to keep on longing for through the many questions, doubts, tears and pain. But for now, it’s ok to keep wrestling with the questions, to keep admitting it feels sometimes like hope is lost and to not pretend to be fine because in all of it Jesus is faithful.

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One Response to “I’ve had questions…”

  1. Glen Says:

    Beautiful words – and sums up where I’m often at too.

    Emma


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